After around 10 weeks of complete exhaustion, my friend mentioned a newborn sleep course and how it changed her life. I immediately took the course after she gifted it to me, and it was like this whole new world of knowledge opened up to me. I had never heard of wake windows, I didn't know how much a newborn should and would sleep, and generally speaking, I felt clueless about the whole thing. After taking a course, I had a blueprint to follow. And though it didn't ensure my daughter slept peacefully every single night, it gave me so much information and took away some of the stress when navigating newborn sleep.
I know women often joke about wearing diapers along with their baby, but for some reason, this didn't really resonate with me as being a reality. Well, it is. After reading a few recovery stories, I made about five padsicles, tossed them in the freezer, and figured that would just about cover my recovery process. How wrong I was. Everyone's experience is different, and some have a harder recovery than others. I personally found it to be an incredibly challenging and painful time. I wish I had put a bit more effort and money into the proper recovery items. During my first month postpartum, I was constantly placing Amazon orders for various pads, Tucks pads, cooling sprays, and so on, basically in search of anything that might help.
I worked out during my pregnancy, and as a personal trainer, I figured as soon as I had my six-week check up and was cleared to work out, I'd be back at the gym. This was not the case. As I mentioned, my recovery felt long, slow, and painful. I had no desire to work out, and I was beating myself up about it. I felt that by six weeks I should have been feeling much better and more like my old self. So many other moms I followed in the fitness world on Instagram seemed to be out jogging during their babies nap time; why wasn't this the case for me?
Ah, another element to new mom life I underestimated. Surely, I'll have time to eat! I love to eat! I've never been one of the people who forgets to eat lunch; I'm usually thinking about meals days in advance. But with a new baby, your mind is pulled in a million directions, and it is actually hard to remember to eat.
Motherhood is hard, and it's particularly hard in those first few weeks and months. There is no shame in asking for help. Many of us have been fed depictions of mothers being able to do it all. Maybe you can technically do it all, but you don't need to, and you shouldn't have to shoulder all of the work. I am fortunate to have a very helpful and involved partner, but I was still hesitant to ask for help.
